I felt a most peculiar sensation this morning.
As I walked outside with the sun’s rays stroking my face, I felt inexplicably as the night before I left for Palestine in July 2009. I was tensely excited, slightly nervous, determined to make the most of it, and anxious to see my relatives that I hadn’t seen for over a decade.
But this is not even close to the case right now – I am not physically going anywhere new, so why do I still feel as if I am about to meet a long-lost sister?
What could it be? Was it a wisp of a memory from the lip balm I just purchased, since it is the exact flavor and brand as the one I’d worn with me when I’d gone to Jerusalem… was it simply the weather, putting me in an especially good mood… or rather, was I actually about to go on a vacation without knowing it… you know… slipped my mind?
I thought about it briefly and confirmed, no, I know I’m not traveling anywhere physically. (God help me if I’d forget that I’m due to visit el-Khaleel the next day!)
But I am about to travel: mentally, spiritually and emotionally.
For if Ramadan is not perceived as the ultimate yearly journey of a lifetime (excluding hajj), I don’t know what could be.
Perhaps the reason this sensation struck me as so unusual is because I have never thought of Ramadan as such. It is a month in which good deeds are multiplied, and so I do my best to accumulate as much of them as possible. I pray and fast and make lots of duaa. It is a month of worship, after all.
But the realization that it is also a vacation for the heart, for the mind, for the soul, to refresh and rejuvenate your spirit until the next one- اللهم بلغنا رمضان – well, let’s just say no wonder I feel as excited as a child who stands next to packed luggage and clutches a ticket to Disney World. It just sort of hit me… in a kind, gentle and loving way, of course. 🙂
May Allah allow this month to be a means for us to connect with Him, and may He increase our deeds and faith and sincerity on all levels. May He provide a way of ease for those in times of great difficulty.